My take on marriage.......

I am getting married in less than a month now. I have told this to couple of my colleagues at work, some Indian, and some Americans etc. What I found very fascinating is the remark they made after hearing and that is what stirred me to write this piece.

Most of the Indians after hearing that I am getting married congratulated me and mostly said, "Good! so you are settling in life now.” I must admit I wondered that how could getting married be equivalent to settling but anyways I just chose to smile and not argue back. I think "settle" is a very binding word, marriage is an imperative beginning of an epoch, but even that is just a commencement of a long journey. On the other hand, when Americans heard they also congratulated me and some of them said, "Let me be the wise one to suggest you not to get married.” Both are very paradoxical answers. The suggestion of not getting married is a staggering suggestion and it made me wonder that are Indians too confidant that marriage will last eternally or are Americans too cynical that they are almost certain that there is an expiry date to marriage.

One of the Americans, who suggested me not to get married, his own marriage was in shatters. He was looking for suggestions from us as to where can he meet girls, things like whether he can sell their home in the present market and will he be able to make any profit on their home. His query on making profit on their home left me a slightly bemused as that was their first home where all their kids were born and where they had spend many years together. It made me ruminate whether there can be any “price tag” attached to a place where dreams were fulfilled and new dreams were seen, where they had shared their hopes and aspirations and spent time with each other building a family. Then I also thought that perhaps they might believe that this is the preeminent way to part, bury the abode or maybe they simple wanted to get the cash and move on. I am sure it must be harder than he made it sound but most of them seem somewhat prepared that if you are getting married you will someday get divorced.

A guy who works with me has been married for only a year and is expecting a baby in less than 2 months. He said once, "I hope I don't need marriage counseling this fast." Once I asked him, "If you are so sure to begin with that you will get divorced then why do you get married? You can just choose to live together.” He looked at me and gave me a look as if saying, are you really that naïve to believe that it will last forever. He finally broke his silence and said, "Do you really believe that you can be with the same person for 40yrs? I cannot and since you are getting married I will not scare you but there is nothing like a marriage that lasts forever.” I replied, "Well, my parents have been married for 30yrs now and I have uncle and aunts who are married for more than 40yrs. So yes I do believe that marriage can last forever.”

Nevertheless, I still wondered that is it actually possible to be in love with anybody for 40yrs. I asked my mom that night, "Ma do you love baba.". Ma replied, "What happened is everything fine between you and Vikram?”. She sounded a little surprised, as I have never told ma that we fight which we do but I somehow prefer not to tell anybody when I am mad at him. I repeated, "Ma please reply, do you love baba and nothing has happened between me and Vikram. A colleague of mine today said that a person cannot love another person for 40yrs. I have also read that scientifically it has been proven that one cannot be in love with anybody for that long. So, do you love baba?" My mom replied, "As you grow older meaning of love also transforms. What you now feel is love will no longer be same 10yrs from now and neither will it be same 30yrs from now. Scientifically they measure love by some chemical that is created in your system when you feel love for somebody and when you stop generating that much amount of chemical you are no longer in love. After 20 or 40yrs that person is your comrade and confidant and it's the camaraderie that you get use to. After children are born family becomes central, you both became central, and it was not about your father or me but about you both. Life is not a romantic novel where you have to be frantically in love but a verity where two people care for each other and family more than themselves. When you are looking for reasons to split, you will find thousands of such reason and when you are looking for reasons to stay, you will also find thousands of such reasons. What makes the difference is what you are looking for and this applies to both you and Vikram.” She did not use the words to describe it but yes, she does love my father. They argue, they fight, and they care for each other. Probably the answer lies in the fact that they knew from the start that they will make it work and so were finding ways to adjust and not split.

However, I also think that there is a huge philosophical difference between Westerners and Indians regarding the perception of sanctity of this relationship. For Indians, after children are born they become the central part of parent’s lives and parent’s interests take a backseat. On the other hand for Westerners it is they who remain most important. I am not portentous to imply that they don’t care or love their kids but that they will not compromise their whole life living with a man/woman just so that the child gets both his/her parents. There will be many such families in India where couples are together only because of children and social pressure.

After coming to America and looking at a very different perspective I have lot of times wondered whether we place our parents to a towering plinth and almost presumptuously ignore the human facet in them. How many Indians will you find who actually believe that their parents have as much right to be in love as them? How many Indian men will you find who in reality believe that their mother was competent and if not forced by their father to stay home could have been a successful professional?

In my generation, the number of divorces has exponentially multiplied and it makes me wonder that are we breaking free from the shackles of society where we must live with a man even if he mistreats or just trying to assert our independence by replicating west blindly without considering the consequences? Both my parents are independent and my mother has been a teacher and both have compromised to accommodate each other. Baba use to get us ready in the morning while ma was preparing breakfast since they both had to leave home at the same time. Then why does my generation believe that the only way to assert independence is divorce? My father has been supportive of all my mom’s endeavors and she has always been there supporting my father. Neither of them can complain that the other flourished at the cost of one. I admire both my parents for that and it is because of them that I believe that marriage do lasts forever and at the same time I can also fulfill my dreams if I work hard.

I do not believe that people should stay in marriage because of social pressure when one has an atrocious, obstinate and not understanding husband/wife but it is sad when people decide to split because one snores or some trivial reason like that. A girl should never bow to a man if he wants to cease her dreams and forces her to stay home and disregard her wishes, cook for the moron who wrecked her subsistence and take care of kids. In that case if she is not willing to give up her career and dreams should definitely divorce the guy but I don't think infidelity in marriage is a good reason for divorcing. "I met a guy/girl at work who is just so great. He/She understands me better than my husband/wife.” This is an awful argument for infidelity. I believe that it’s extremely important to think and reflect before making the decision of getting married. Once that decision is made, it is important to make it work or in case of inconsiderate and/or abysmal spouse atleast give it a honest and sincere try.

I recently saw a data that really bothered me. Bangalore leads India with maximum number of divorces 9000+ per year, then Mumbai with 5000+ per year, Delhi 4500+ per year and then 2000-3000+ in Chennai and Kolkata per year. It is heartbreaking when we take such a vital decision so frivolously. I have some very strong opinions about stereotype Indian men who are not willing to recognize that women too have a career and dreams just like them. Nonetheless, marriage is a very sacred institution and in changing times like ours, it becomes even more imperative to weigh on the decision more critically. No person or relationship is perfect and Neverland does not exist in real world. Falling in love is effortless but lot of times the person you may fall in love may not be the person you can see yourself spending your life with and in that case, no matter how excruciating the u-turn is, it is worth the pain in the end. Finding a person you love and can picture yourself sharing your life together is a rare amalgamation and if you find one, get married. If you find somebody you can see yourself spending your life with but don’t think that you are in love, even then it is the right decision to get married. Nevertheless, whatever may be the reason for getting married I do believe that our generation should not take this decision flippantly? We have a responsibility of preserving the excellent aspects of our culture for next generation. Nothing is more comforting and soothing than a believe that no matter how difficult the challenges are they have their family standing rock solid behind them. Our parents made sure we had that believe, it is our responsibility to ensure that our children also have that believe. It is not worth to swap such an excellent, comforting, and stabilizing aspect of our culture for the ever mystifying and nomadic “perfect love” exploration of the west. Probably I will still wonder if it is possible to be in love with the same person for 40yrs but as years go by, I hope I will find my answer.

Love seems the swiftest, but it is the slowest of all growths. No man or woman really knows what perfect love is until they have been married a quarter of a century.

-Mark Twain

What it means to support Barack Obama?

For the first time in my life, I am so deeply affected by a political race and a political candidate. I have been a fervent supporter of Barack Obama since the primaries. My support for him is not because he is an immigrant’s son or that he has lived in third world or that his skin color is not white; it is the fact that finally there is a leader with vision for a prosperous future. He makes me wonder that maybe this is how Mahatma Gandhi or Martin Luther King inspired so many ordinary people to do extra-ordinary things. For people who talk about his inexperience should read some world history. The greatest leaders in the world did not become great by performing task themselves but by inspiring others to do make big sacrifices and fighting larger than life battles. He has a vision for future and age does not make somebody visionary, either one has it or they do not. Age can only solidify one’s beliefs. India got freedom because of Gandhiji’s capability of inspiring the whole nation to unite together and participate in Non-Cooperation movement. He inspired people to silently take battering from Britishers to propel the message that it’s high time that they leave our country.

Everyday looking at Barack Obama I am inspired to work a little harder and keep pursuing my dreams. I am sure I am not the only one who is so deeply touched by this great man. At times, I feel blessed that I am part of this historic event which will shape the 21st century world history. He is the contemporary politician my generation can relate to. His personnel life struggles are an inspiration for so many of us.

Yes, he did go to Harvard law school but that does not make him an out of touch elite. He is an elite who climbed up the ladder of class through his hard work and determination, nobody gifted it to him on a gold plate. He lived on food stamp at a point in his life, his mother and grand parents have sacrificed so much for him to reach where he is today. So all his critics who claim that he is out of touch elitist know that they are lying. Barack Obama is truly like one of us who made it on his own and that is what is most inspiring to me.

I was awed by his speech on race in March. He is probably the only politician who could address this subject so objectively and eloquently. This speech in history will go down as one of the best speeches. In his speech he was not lamenting about anything neither did he hold anybody nefarious, instead he was uniting people regardless of their differences in history. History has been very putrid to lot of people but disparaging over the past will not take us anywhere. We all need to confluence now and that is the only way we will find an effulgent future. This is the message resonated by Barack Obama. World has been ruled too long by corrupt “Divide and Rule” policy leaders. Now it is time to have a leader who will unite us despite our differences.

Recently when he decided to leave his campaign trail to visit his ailing grandmother, my respect for him augmented. He did not do anything astounding, there can never be anybody more important than one’s parents and sibling, and no job in the world is more important than them. The reason for my reverence for him is due to his priorities in life. If a man, who is so close to winning presidency, can take a risk of leaving campaign for 2days to meet his ailing grandmother then his priorities are in right place. We all have formative figures in our lives and nothing can be more important than them. I can trust a country in such a man’s judgment. With Sarah Palin’s latest $150, 000 dressing spree a very startling comparison was made between Obama, his wife, and her. I saw a picture of Obama on campaign trail with his shoes worn out and it reminded me of my parents. My parents always gave the best to us and never cared about themselves. I am not suggesting that Obama is as altruistic as my parents were to us but he is not a parasite thriving at my money unlike Palin. Again, the question of priorities, what one thinks is more important.

In recent days, watching him in the midst of global economic crisis my conviction for him has only grown. Watching him this election season once again my belief entrenched that no matter how viscous attacks are, how cheap your opponent(s) or critics are only calm and composed mind can win. Anger is a sign of weak person. I do not remember ever any politician influencing me so deeply. When I look at him and read his story, it inspires me and generates hope in me; a hope that with hard work, dedication, discipline, and vision I can also fulfill my dreams. Most importantly, he makes me believe that every dream is worth fighting for and in the dictionary of hardworking and sincere people, the word impossible does not exist. To me believe in the audacity of my dreams and hopes are what it means to support Barack Obama.

2008 Wichita Air Show

I have been hearing about the air show since I moved to Wichita. Being an aviation enthusiast, I was looking forward towards this experience. Wichita air show was on 23rd and 24th august.http://www.wichitafestivals.com/events/WFF/index.html

When I reached close to the airfield, I could see pilots performing stunts in the sky. I wanted to stop driving and just gaze at the sky. I was enthralled. Eventually I did find a parking and parked my car. There were many acrobat pilots including Patty Wagstaff. http://www.pattywagstaff.com/ I had read about Patty that she is one of the best and this was my chance to see her finesse. Hers was my favorite stunt. The best one was when she flew her plane upside down approx 100ft above ground. To execute a performance like that one needs temperament, poise, and has to be flying connoisseur. Kudos to this young female pilot.

All the pilots were twirling their planes, stalling their planes so skillfully, forming beautiful formations etc. One pilot spin the plane with engine shut off, then came out of spin, and landed. He did all this with engine shut off by just manipulating the elevators, rudders, and flaps. It was amazing. Then a trio performed displaying all sorts of formations in the sky. The scariest one was when all three planes were converging towards each other just to traverse each very narrowly. I missed a breadth for a second. I felt like they almost collided. There was a beautiful display of absolute symphony in their performance.

While all these thrilling performances were being exhibited in sky, there were planes on display in ground. There was a F-86 on display. I climbed on the wings to experience the thrill inside the cabin. I was awed at the sight of the gadgetry installed on that minuscule cabin. It is a beautiful piece of art, majesty, and annihilation. There were business jets and a Boeing plane on display too.

Towards the end of the show came the mighty F-15E. I could feel the sound of this ogre in my heartbeat. It was a breathtaking experience. No, wonder why the world is petrified of it. The show was brought to an end with a performance called Harmony. An old fighter plane and F-15E flew next to each other in complete harmony. Then they went apart horizontally and later the F-15E rose straight up in a line. F-15E flies at the speed of sound and the speed can be professed by the swiftness at which it covers distance vertically. It vanishes in seconds.

I came out of the show convinced that there is nothing more liberating than flying free in sky like a bird.

Disgrace....By J.M.Coetzee

I read this novel first time in 2003 December, my first winter holidays in America. Almost undoubtedly, this was an awful pick especially when I was all alone in my apartment with all my roommates and friends out on vacation. Disgrace is an exceptionally dark book about distressed people in disquieting times. After I completed reading this book, I was miserable for days and felt even more forlorn. Despite its obscurity, this book is excellently crafted work of pain and candor set up in post apartheid epoch in South Africa.

The story revolves around a twice-divorced old professor of communications and romantic poetry at cape technical university, David Lurie. He is a 52 yr old man whose position in college was reduced despite which he taught his classes devotedly. He visited prostitutes unremittingly for his sexual needs. He had just ended an affectionate relation with a prostitute and was looking for another sexual partner. One evening he meets an attractive student from his romantic poetry class, Melanie. Tête-à-tête leads to an intimate relationship. Lurie, although, sentient of the fact that this association will be disastrous for him, goes ahead with the affair. One day he completely ignores Melanie’s wish of not having sex. Circumstances go haywire after this. Mealanie and her father file a sexual harassment case against him. Lurie confesses he is guilty of all the charges but repudiates to express any remorse for his acts in front of an academic committee. With the shifting course of zephyr in the new era, the university was also transforming into a contemporary society. This contemporary society wanted remorse and an acknowledgement that he made a mistake, which he was not willing to do. By the end of first quarter of the book disgraced by his actions, David lurie is forced to leave Cape Town.

He goes to live with his daughter Lucy. She is living alone in countryside on a small plot of land and sells flower for living. There he tries to revive his relationship with his daughter. There he also faces the challenge of understanding and adjusting to the changing equation of blacks and whites relationship in post apartheid Africa. It was here where he again stumbles upon disgrace but this time from receiving end. Three ruffians beat him, pilfer there belongings and rape his daughter. Lurie later tells that they did not rape Lucy to have sex but as an act of Lucy and Lurie’s subjection and subjugation. Lucy and Lurie were white and their assailants black. Lucy decides not to report her rape but instead only report the assault on Lurie and stolen chattels. Lurie is outraged and wants justice this time but Lucy confronts him with the fact that in this changing time no authority or process is equipped to deal with there situation. In the book, there is manifestation of rule of law but throughout the novel, there is barely any respect shown for the authorities and procedures. Lucy like Lurie does not believe in the law and so does not want to report her rape though this time the situation for lucy was more complicated than lurie’s. Lucy has a black hand, Petrus. Petrus had affirmed his independence by buying his own plot of land and working on it. Lucy had realized that this is what the future in South Africa holds for her and she will be able to survive there only at his sufferance. As the story progresses there is a palpable and expedient shift of power from lucy to petrus. Lurie returns to cape town. He starts helping in an animal clinic. In the meantime, Lucy's situation becomes more precarious, but she will not accept Lurie's offer of escape.

At times, the haughtiness or absurdity of the characters in resisting doing what is the obvious solution gets under my skin. Lurie is willing to send Lucy to Holland, but she does not want to abandon her small piece of land. I fail to understand what holds her back from leaving considering the sort of life she has here, despite the compromises she will have to make. But then, the protagonists are the soul of this narrative and the fact that they are very convoluted and classically perplexing delineates the novel. I find it very distressing that instead of getting over the rape Lucy decides to live with the reminiscence of it, her rape child. Even her logic of keeping her child did not bode well.
Asked whether she loves the child growing in her yet she says: No. How could I ? But I will. Love will grow -- one can trust Mother Nature for that. I am determined to be a good mother.

At this stage, lurie chooses not to remind lucy where her fortitude has gotten her, nor does he question her premise of love. This time, for the first time, he chooses to be supportive of a woman in his life.

Ending of this novel will leave you dreadfully bitter and wanting to amend it. After a lot of contemplation, I could not think of any other obvious ending. The story is immensely sad and no fairytale quick fixes have been offered by Coetzee and rightly so. Can there be any quick fixes to a predicament, which is a product of a century of racial oppression? Coetzee’s protagonists throw light to the post apartheid times in south Africa. Despite the darkness of the story, Coetzee keeps the reader cling to the book with his impregnable yet exquisite tone. This book is brutally truthful and immensely compelling, often moving. What i found most compelling about this book is its bellow of agony and its imperative honesty. This is a must read book for every person but don’t read it when you are alone.

The sweetest memory of my life...........

I vaguely remember this incident. My mother was pregnant. It was some festival and I went to a fair with my father. My mom wanted us to bring a picture of Bal Gopal instead I made my father buy a picture of a cute baby brother. I gave it to mom and told “I got bhai”. That was the first face I gave to the word brother.

The only day in my reminiscence so lucid is the day my brother was born - 6th January 1989. That day it was drizzling since morning. There was a total blackout in Punjab since the two assassins of Indira Gandhi were being executed. All shops were closed and there was barely any soul seen in the streets.

I was at a family friend’s house. Baba entered and told me that I will be getting to meet my baby brother today. I was ecstatic. That day baba’s scooter stopped working abruptly so we took a rickshaw for hospital. I can still feel the smell of wet earth and dank rickshaw cover. We reached hospital and we went to see ma. She was wearing a blue gown. Ma was anxiously waiting for me to reach hospital. She was very critical and she did not want to leave for operation without meeting me. I remember her telling me "Tinny, ma loves you and take care of yourself. Study well.” I don’t think at that time I really comprehended the gravity of the situation. I was blissfully lost in the thought that today is the day I will get my playmate, my companion.

After ma went into OT, I was taken to my father’s colleague’s house. His parents use to work in that hospital so their flat was inside hospital premises. I was sitting down on floor. My father’s colleague’s mother offered me cookies, paratha and especially requested me to sit on a couch. It was a freezing January afternoon in Ludhiana. I just wanted to be left alone.

After hours of waiting I saw Mita aunty and Paul aunty coming. They said in a loud voice “You have a baby brother!”. That was not news to me. My sister instinct knew this from the day my parents informed me that I will have a sibling. I always knew it will be a brother.

I wanted to go and see him but they said I have to wait for some more time. That really exasperated me. After a while baba took me to meet my little brother. He was the cutest child I have ever seen. Tiny hands and feet, cutest face and head covered with beautiful black hair. Baba had bought a small jar of honey. Baba enlightened me with the information that the first person who will make him taste sweet is the person he will love the most. So I took little honey and put it in his mouth. In few seconds he did green toilet. I got scared. I asked baba “Did he not like me?”. As it turns out later, he did.

We have spend very few yrs together living in the same house. I left home for engineering when I was 18yrs and at that time he was only 9.5 yrs but it has never felt that we didn’t live long enough together. We were always a thought away. I love and care him the most and will always be. I can do anything to ensure a happy life for him. I wish I could take all his sorrows and miseries and just fill his life with happiness.

He has entered into a new phase in his. He is in engineering college now. When he was a child he was my best buddy, my playmate. He has always been there for me, supporting me always in whatever I did. Now he is not just my kid brother but also a genuine friend and a confidant. As times passes our relationship will grow stronger and maturer. He is my strength, my pride. I hope he realizes someday that he has lot of potential and he needs to work really hard to reach where he deserves to be. I love you bhai and will always be there to watch your back.

Sarah Palin..... One woman I adsolutely detest.

Sarah Palin is the vice presidential nominee of John McCain. The debate that she having a down syndrome baby makes her nomination weak or erroneous is bothering me. Hello! If there was a man instead of her he would have been sympathized and it would have been taken for granted that his wife will take care of the toddler. So the problem is that this time the “mother” is running for office. I can’t stop but ask this question that why the society is not stipulating the father to take or substantially share the responsibility of the child? Is it that fathers are meant to be doing nothing except giving their surname to the child?

For me both parents of a down-syndrome 4 month yr old child will disqualify to run for the second highest post in a country- vice presidency. As parent’s people have certain responsibilities and after knowing that the child will suffer down syndrome one decides to give birth to the child is a brave step but the responsibility just starts there. There is no point in being Pro-Life if you cannot nurture a life. Sarah Palin just seems to be thinking that giving birth to a down syndrome child makes her a Pro-Life candidate. To me she failed to show her commitment to the cause. She is willing to abandon her child for Vice-Presidency or vice versa. Both of which will be disastrous especially the later.

Another astounding news came from Sarah Palin’s family. Her 17yr old unmarried daughter Bristol is 5 months pregnant. Wow! What happened to all the talks of “conservative” family values? She couldn’t even control her 17yr old daughter and she is against sex education in school? Basically Sarah Palin is against sex education in school and Pro-Life which means in the next few years if she comes to office we will see a sudden rise in teenage pregnancy. Wow! That is the definition of women progress according to Sarah Palin. How can she even compare herself to Hillary Clinton. Hillary stands for women emancipation and Sarah stands for woman suppression.

Its great that Sarah made sure that her daughter keeps the child but my question is that is she capable of taking care of her child on her own? Does Sarah Palin still not get it? Her Pro-Life stand will either fill the lives of many young teenage girls with melancholy or increase the number of orphans in this country. How can an unwanted pregnancy of a young teenager be fitting? A child should be given birth only when parents can support the needs of a child. How can anybody take care of child when they can’t afford to buy the basics for them? Sarah Palin’s daughter is amongst privileged few whose parents are rich enough to help her in this juncture of her life but there are many who are on their own. How can anti abortion activists justify the birth of a child and then either engulf a teenage mother’s life with desolation or landing a child in an orphanage? Every child who is born deserves a home and government should support programs which give every child a home and not increase orphans. One cannot blame a 16-17yr mother who will be forced by government (if anti abortion is established) to give birth to a child just to abandon her child to orphanage. Its true motherhood is all about caring, loving and nourishing but girl/women needs to be prepared to take such a gargantuan responsibility.

Some conservatives might argue that reckless young people should not be given a chance to get away with there ruthlessness. Why is the society not forcing the fathers of young teenage girl’s child to owe the responsibility? Are guys not as responsible for their action as girls?

I agree that the prom culture of this nation is scary but more programs which will encourage school and parents to talk to their adolescents is vital. Despite all efforts when a mishap happens, one should not be forced to face the brunt of it so callously. Also society never forces the father of a teenage girl’s child to take the responsibility then why do women want to add another injustice against women in the already long list of injustices?

Sarah Palin’s family story pose the question how can somebody in her shoes be Pro-Life? To me Pro-Life is somebody who embraces life and ensures a secured and safe childhood to their children. Can Sarah Palins 17yr old daughter who is just a high school student ensure that promise to her child without her parents help? If elected as Vice- President, can Sarah Palin keep her promise to her 4 month child whom she decided to give birth with a promise of love, care and extra nurture that child will need? If the answers to the questions above are no then somebody who fail fails to keep the promises to her children, can never be trusted to keep the promises to the nation.

I am an ambitious woman but there are times when both men and women need to make some conscious decisions about their loved ones and career. It may be the most difficult choice but that also shows the strength of character and commitment of the person. Being a governor of Alaska and juggle between breast feeding and blackberry is possible, not vice presidency. I will be really scared and uncomfortable with a Vice President who is completely inexperienced and has a very demanding home responsibility. If she is worthy of this position she could have deferred her plan to run for Vice-Presidency or even Presidency for another 8 yrs when her child would have grown a little and her daughter would have settled in her life. These 8yrs would have given her enough executive experience as Alaska governor. Sarah Palin should know this that being a parent demands its own sacrifices and so does having a successful career. It’s important to make the right scarifies at right time. This wasn’t the time to sacrifice family but instead was the time to sacrifice career

A Tribute to Satyajit Ray

I am a Bengali who was bought up in Punjab so my only interactions with Bengal was during my summer vacations. My earliest memories don’t go back to my parent’s watching Satyajit Ray but instead my mom with her brother and sister in-law watching Uttam-Suchita movies. I used to get really bored and could never understand why anybody should watch Bengali movies. I found the answer to that question years later. I am not Uttam-Suchita fan and may be rightly so. I don’t belong to the generation of Uttam-Suchita hysteria. I am ardent fan of Satyajit Ray and can anyday watch his movies except maybe Shatranj ke khiladi . I was introduced to Bengal through Satyajit Ray movies and I am not talking only about Pather Panchali but also Charulata, Nayak, Ghanashatru etc. Satyajit ray was a director who could capture emotions on camera as it would be in real life. He was probably the first person in Indian cinema to introduce true cinematography. You can watch his Pather Panchali where young Apu and his sister discover train or Charu falling for her brother-in-law and both emotions seemed so unadulterated. Though the emotions are so different, Satyajit Ray's touch is evident in both the scenes. Whether I watch his Devi or Shonnar Kella or Agantuk I can’t stop admiring his ability as a film maker. Bengal has been blessed with some phenomenal writers, filmmakers who have very sacredly preserved the era they belonged in their work. Satyajit Ray was amongst one of them. In my library I will have one complete section dedicated to Satyajit ray movies and books and that will be my small tribute to him. Watch this space for movie and book reviews.

This is me...........

I have been thinking about blogging for quite sometime. To introduce myself, I am a Bengali girl, my parents' loving daughter, a caring and protective sister (my brother says so), a lover- soon to be wife, an engineer by profession, a doctoral student in aerospace engineering, working in an aviation company (we build business jets), a painter, an avid reader, a movie aficionado and aspiring to be much more than what I am. I am a very opinionated person. I have opinions and stands on almost everything starting from politics, to books, to movies, to fashion, to feminism, to love, to marriage, to what it means to be a Bengali or an Indian... you have guessed it right, almost everything. So blogging was the best way of sharing my thoughts and opinions with faceless people out there with whom I may never meet but their thoughts and opinions may change the way I see and perceive things or make them even firmer. This blog is an effort of trying to find who I am. Isn't that a huge question? I believe the choices that we make are what shape us, for good or bad. We make these choices based on what we think is good for us or people whom we care for.So at the end it all comes down to our thoughts. So this blog is all about my thoughts and opinions on various issues, books, movies etc.

Now let me share my reason for my blog's name "An Argumentative Indian"which is also a name of Dr. Amartya Sen's book. These three words best express me in a nutshell and besides this the other raison d'être is that I have colossal respect for Dr. Sen. I hope you all enjoy reading my blog and your comments are welcome - both honest condemnation and approbation!